Weatherproof

Biff's Story

February 26, 2024 Claudia Lutes & Hannah Hughes Season 1 Episode 34

In this episode of Weatherproof, we sit down with our friend Biff, a newly minted Canadian citizen from Northern Ireland with a passion for the outdoors and snowboarding. Biff shares his personal growth journey and the challenges he has faced along the way. Listeners will hear about Biff's experiences in navigating relationships, maintaining mental wellness, and finding balance between work and personal activities. Join us as Biff's story unfolds, filled with insights and inspiration for anyone seeking to overcome life's obstacles and thrive in the great outdoors.

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Claudia [00:00:00]:
Hi, everyone. Claudia here. Before we get to today's episode, I've got a little update on the format of the Weatherproof podcast for y'all. This year, Hannah and I are so excited to be inviting guests onto the show more regularly to share their stories of personal growth in the outdoors with you. With that in mind, our first male guest on Weatherproof is my dear friend Biff. Biff, a newly minted Canadian citizen hailing from Northern Ireland and I became friends years ago through shared love of snowboarding. Little did we know that that would become the foundation for an incredible bond and the avenue for many more adventures. Biff was generous enough to come on the show to speak candidly to us about his own personal growth and mental health journey and the role the outdoors has played in both of those aspects of his life.

Claudia [00:00:47]:
Finally, please forgive us for the sound quality of this episode. We're still working out some kinks in our recording systems.

Claudia [00:00:53]:
Welcome to Weatherproof.

Hannah [00:00:55]:
We are your hosts, Hannah.

Claudia [00:00:57]:
And Claudia.

Hannah [00:00:58]:
Join us as we talk about the raw, real, and relatable elements of Outdoor Adventure.

Claudia [00:01:02]:
Before we get into that, we're gonna beg you to join our email list at weatherproofpodcast.com, and to hit that follow button wherever you listen to podcasts. If you're watching us on YouTube, hit that like button and subscribe.

Hannah [00:01:15]:
We are recording on the unceded territory of the Squamish and Lilwat Nations. We acknowledge and honour the stewards of this land on which we live, work and play.

Claudia [00:01:24]:
I'm so excited that you're here. I'm so excited for today's episode for so many reasons, we are hosting one of my favourite people on the planet, Johnny Biff. You are our first male guest on the show

Biff [00:01:38]:
Yeah, buddy.

Claudia [00:01:38]:
And we've been having what I would consider podcast worthy conversations since the start of our friendship. So I can't wait to bring those conversations to the rest of the world today.

Biff [00:01:51]:
Yeah. I'm stoked. I'm stoked. Yeah.

Claudia [00:01:53]:
Welcome. And thanks for joining us. Thanks for driving down, both of you from Whistler and being here today.

Biff [00:02:00]:
You're welcome. My pleasure.

Hannah [00:02:03]:
Okay.

Claudia [00:02:03]:
So years ago now, you were living in Northern Ireland and had the bright idea to move to Canada.

Biff [00:02:14]:
Yeah.

Claudia [00:02:15]:
Can you tell us a little bit about what gave you that idea and what made you decide to pull the trigger?

Biff [00:02:21]:
Chris Edens, He well, actually, they go back when I asked him if he wanna go snowboarding, with with me and my family and, friends to Bansko in Bulgaria. Literally, the minute he got there, he was so stoked like I've never seen him stoked before, and he just wanted to snowboard. And he got well, because he had skied before, but he got a snowboard. My uncle got him got him up and running and whatever else, and he was so stoked. The year after that is when he came back and he experienced powder. And then literally from that day he was like, we gotta we gotta snowboard and he he picked up actually the story of how he picked up on Whistler was was kinda cool, but he picked up on Whistler and that was it. That was his drive and, that's why we're here. That's pretty much why I left as well because he was the fuel for that fire.

Biff [00:03:13]:
It's huge.

Claudia [00:03:14]:
Awesome. Yeah.

Biff [00:03:15]:
That was great.

Claudia [00:03:15]:
We'll have to have Chris on the show too, and he can tell us the story of how he found Whistler.

Biff [00:03:19]:
Oh, he wouldn't, he wouldn't admit it. He wouldn't admit it. No, it's a me, It's, it was really his drive and I was I was dating a girl back then and of course, I was involved and I wanted to go and I wanted to do it but really I wasn't fully connected as especially as much as, as as as he was, you know. But he got me through, which was great. I'd be like, forever thankful for that.

Claudia [00:03:48]:
And so when you came, was it with the idea that you might stay or was it just for a season?

Biff [00:03:55]:
I don't think either of us had any idea really. It was one when he got here 2 weeks prior to I did, and then he was telling me how much rent was and all these things. And I'm, like, sending my mom, like, oh, what am I gonna do? Like, this is, you know, this is crazy. Like, I can't afford that and all those sorts of things. And, she was just like, just go work it out. I'll buy a plane deck at home if you're stuck. But really no thoughts, and I don't think Edens had any thought either. He just said just just go.

Biff [00:04:24]:
Like, we we just wanted to go snowboard and that was it. Yeah. We had 2 year fees, so there was, you know, some sort of constraint there. But other than that, just see what see what happens.

Claudia [00:04:35]:
Pamski, what a legend.

Biff [00:04:37]:
Oh yeah, absolutely. Absolutely.

Claudia [00:04:42]:
Did you think at the time, like, knowing how much you were leaving behind even just for a season, did you have any instinct of how that decision to come here to Whistler, just for the love of snowboarding, was going to impact your life?

Biff [00:05:02]:
Again, I think at the at the time, it was just all new exciting. I think that that was just the thing, something different than most people. And again, Aiden's and I were always the the the guys in the group that were doing things. We would always want organizing things, getting things to happen in it. As patterns go along, people get older, you know, things don't happen the same, and we just wanted something something different. So again, like, really didn't really think of how much it would impact. We just we're so stoked to go, that was it. Like, as soon as I get on the the bus in Northern Ireland, my mind was open because I was already set off on the journey.

Biff [00:05:41]:
You know, it's like all that build up and nerve, and then I got on the bus and it was it all dissipated. It was gone. And literally haven't stopped that, yet in something years ago.

Hannah [00:05:52]:
And what was life like prior to that decision of moving to Canada? What was your trajectory? What were you doing? Were you celebrating lunch? Were you in the outdoors a lot? Or were you on the were you on the white picket fence track? Where were you at?

Biff [00:06:11]:
Don't know what the white picket fence track is. I mean, a bit of everything really, like it was riding trials bikes, playing football, working working a lot. Probably the the biggest reason was that all the things that I love to do kinda started to mellow out, and work came primary and, you know, got in a relationship. It was great. It was a good relationship, but, like, same thing. It just, like, generally what everyone seemingly does and less less hobbies and really it got a bit flat, you know. Didn't want to go out into the normal commercial clubs unless it was dance music, of course, but, you know, it kinda got a bit flat.

Claudia [00:06:56]:
That's the white picket fence track.

Biff [00:06:58]:
Oh, okay.

Claudia [00:06:59]:
All of your buddies and your hobbies and your kind of youthful exuberance takes a back seat Yeah. To career, family

Biff [00:07:09]:
Great. Gotcha. House.

Hannah [00:07:11]:
You buy a house, you get married,

Biff [00:07:13]:
you get

Hannah [00:07:13]:
kids, you Nice. Nice. Nice.

Biff [00:07:14]:
Well, I was definitely, somewhat of a trajectory. Yeah. Definitely on, like, I was self employed, running a really good business. It was great. I enjoyed that. I got a lot from that. I really, really enjoyed that. Working for myself and just doing good work for good people and and really building a a good business up.

Biff [00:07:34]:
So that was a hard thing to leave because, well, it's fun and you're your own boss and you create your own revenue but and other people's revenue which is even better but, 100% worth it. Well, at this point, 100% worth it.

Hannah [00:07:47]:
So you closed your business to come to us soon?

Biff [00:07:51]:
A month prior. And luckily, I had really good friends, in McNichol Romer Joinery who said said they'll take me for a month, pay me for a month so I could close my business and then kinda, fee it out, which works perfectly.

Hannah [00:08:03]:
It's a pretty decent sacrifice. Like, you can't just, you know, turn around and go back to your old job if your mom buys you a plane ticket home, like you're kind of closing a fair few doors by doing that.

Biff [00:08:16]:
-Yeah, like to to a degree, you can always make it happen once you make it happen again, kind of thing. But something I didn't, you know, nigh I knew that, then I think I get I guess I knew that because I was gonna go to a new country and make it happen. You show up with a backpack and away you go, you know, and you make the rest happen.

Claudia [00:08:34]:
Yeah. I mean, I think that's a real entrepreneurial perspective on things, and you've started your own business here. Yeah. As as well, which we'll get into later, but I think not everybody thinks that

Biff [00:08:48]:
way. Well, that's cool.

Hannah [00:08:49]:
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Claudia [00:08:51]:
I mean, it got you here, which is amazing. I love the idea that your love for snowboarding is what set you off on this trajectory. When did you first discover that

Biff [00:09:03]:
love? Snowboarding love?

Claudia [00:09:05]:
Yeah.

Biff [00:09:07]:
2 hours after I started. Pretty much 3 hours after I got I think it was 2 hour lesson, something like that. I got it was an hour lesson and then maybe split. That's what it was. We had a one to 1 lesson, which was 75 Lev, which is, like, probably $40. Amazing one on 1. Nice. So that was that was awesome.

Biff [00:09:29]:
And we had 1 hour that went to snowboard a bit and then had one after lunch and that was like my first real run down was I'm like, this is insane. Like it was that was the best and then from then that was it.

Claudia [00:09:42]:
And how old were you?

Biff [00:09:44]:
19. 19. Yeah.

Hannah [00:09:46]:
And this

Claudia [00:09:46]:
was on one of your family trips? To Yeah.

Biff [00:09:48]:
It was in, yeah. Well, I know it's like a kinda big family. I say family. It was my family was my auntie, uncle, mum, other auntie, and then all of their friends. And just a big mix of their friends and people they've met from around the world and trips and life and everyone who's keen to go skiing. We would all ski together, eat together, and party together. It was honestly the best. It was just such a vast range of age as well.

Biff [00:10:15]:
Anything from, I think, Doreen's son Jack was 16 and then there was maybe the oldest at 55.

Hannah [00:10:23]:
Nice.

Biff [00:10:23]:
You know, so it was a good mix.

Claudia [00:10:25]:
Yeah, and to think of like a $40 ski lesson,

Claudia [00:10:28]:
what does Whistler Blackcomb charge?

Hannah [00:10:30]:
Like $900 for a day private lesson.

Biff [00:10:33]:
€100 for a ski pass for a week. Wow. Food was amazing. You got the same elevation, same tree line, like, pretty much 2 hours away from the Greek coast. You get the same weather system as you do here in Whistler, and It's like, it was amazing. Super quick.

Claudia [00:10:49]:
So we're all going to Bulgaria?

Biff [00:10:51]:
Yeah. One day I would love to. Absolutely. The whole thing would be great.

Hannah [00:10:54]:
And it's it's fun going back to somewhere that you learnt to ride. I have been back to Australia since moving here and skied at Perisher for a day. You're like, wow, some of this stuff used to be hard, and going back to that

Biff [00:11:07]:
Yeah, but you have in your head.

Hannah [00:11:09]:
And like you feel like you haven't really improved because there's so many amazing riders in Whistler. So you're always measuring yourself against whoever's better than you, and there's an infinite number of people that are better than you here. And then you go home and you're like, oh, I'm so much better than when I left.

Biff [00:11:23]:
Yeah. You look at a certain run and you're like, oh, I can tell you that's Yeah. You know, it's easy.

Hannah [00:11:29]:
Yeah. Yeah.

Biff [00:11:30]:
Yeah. I'm looking forward to go back one day.

Claudia [00:11:32]:
Awesome. I'll come.

Biff [00:11:33]:
Yeah. I mean, how's the place there? 2 bed apartment?

Claudia [00:11:36]:
Sick. Sold.

Biff [00:11:38]:
Oh, that's cool.

Claudia [00:11:41]:
How has snowboarding contributed to the way that you perceive yourself? Like, it's something that you spend a lot of time doing. We've talked about how much we love snowboarding and, you know, how good it is for our mental health, but in regards to how you perceive yourself as an individual and your own unique identity. Do you think of snowboarding as being a big part of who you are?

Biff [00:12:06]:
Maybe when I the first few years getting to snowboarding, and I'm like, oh, yeah. I'm a snowboarder. But then a personal journey thereafter kinda made me realize that's not who I am. If so, if I one day I'm not able to do it, then, you know, there's a part of me that, sure, I'll have to let go, but I'm not gonna hang up on it for too long. Well, try my best not to, you know.

Claudia [00:12:30]:
And how do you think you got to that place? Because I think that's really healthy. I mean, we've talked about this before. Right? This idea that we kind of tie our identities so closely to the things that we do, and that can be really detrimental.

Biff [00:12:43]:
Yeah. When you take it away, then you you feel as if you're nowhere near the same person that you are or what you think you are, which is it's not it's not it's not even close. At this time, I had one of the toughest things was pot. Having like, oh, I'm a pot smoker and I could not stop smoking pot because I I love the fact that I'm I'm a I'm a pot head as such. But I can't seem bigger journey with that one. That was that was a hard one to get over, obviously. But it's the same thing with with any of that. You know, you just gotta pull yourself out and understand what your values are and what you give to people.

Biff [00:13:18]:
You know, I would think I'm a humble person, and I'm always there to give give as much as I can give to anyone who wants to receive it. And that's why I am sure I like to snowboard. I love to snowboard. It makes me feel free, but I'm not identifying as a snowboarder.

Hannah [00:13:34]:
And so how is that journey from a snowboarder that sees himself as a person who as to seeing yourself as a person who gives value to people and is a friend and is a partner and whatever other ways you see yourself now. What what triggered that and and how did that happen?

Biff [00:14:02]:
I guess a lot of people around the age of 27, 28, I guess, go free. I know you question a lot of things in life. I mean, not everyone. A lot of people go for it in a different time of life. Generally, a lot of people do. They question. They maybe had a bump in the road. I've never not had drive and which I'm super, super grateful for, and that was the whole journey of that because like, literally 14, 5th yeah.

Biff [00:14:30]:
14, I started carpentry and I had drive, like, straight back into school. I smashed school. I stayed into, finished projects and all of my course work done by by Christmas. And I had drive the whole way up until I hit like 28th, I think it was 28th and lost everything and that's when what I like to call and said the the the Claudia, the recalibration of the subconscious, which was depression, of course. But now I'm through through that. That's what I like to call it. And that's why it is exactly what it is that you're doing is recalibrating the things you've never questioned in your subconscious and the things that just run-in the background with with no, questioning and, you know, things you perceive as a young boy growing up or a young girl growing up. You know, things happen in life regardless of what happened.

Biff [00:15:18]:
Even if you know physically what happened, you've perceived it in a different way. And all of those things came came through. And, to be honest, I lost the drive for everything. Snowboarding, number 1, I guess, didn't even wanna go. I was even off work. It was the most time I was off work, and I didn't go snowboarding, cause I didn't enjoy it. Well, I didn't let myself enjoy it more so. But I needed that time to re evaluate all things in life.

Biff [00:15:44]:
And then after it, now I just, like, stoked anytime we go snowboarding. Sure. I would love to snowboard more right now because the weather's not playing ball, but anytime you go on, that's and that's what I want. That's what you wanna do with anything, so then you can focus. And you're not stuck behind something that you haven't dealt with.

Claudia [00:16:01]:
I love that you call it a recalibration of the subconscious. Yeah.

Biff [00:16:04]:
It's the best. I'm gonna I'm gonna write a book one day about that.

Hannah [00:16:07]:
I bet. And so that was a period of depression that you went through at that time that just like kind of reset

Biff [00:16:14]:
Everything. I questioned absolutely everything about myself, at which was hard. There was one, morning, I was eating breakfast listening to, Renee Bryan, and just started crying. And I've never really let, you know, let myself cry that much which, you know, generalizing, meal kind of thing, but, yeah, that was that that moment was kind of the moment I was like okay, like let's let's go. It was a kind of real let's go, like, a realization day where I just need a lot of things go. And that by simply just crying that I it just, like, a wave came over me and it came out. I was like, you gotta let those emotions flow.

Claudia [00:16:55]:
Do you remember what it was that triggered all that emotion?

Biff [00:16:59]:
In that moment? Yeah. Oh, no idea. No idea. No. Well, I say no idea. It was probably something Renee Brian was talking about in is like the Colosseum or something she was talking about. And she was like, it was an analogy of life and like it's Sam is much easier to be in the stands opposed to be in the

Claudia [00:17:15]:
In the arena?

Biff [00:17:16]:
In the arena kind of thing. Yeah. But, yeah, I can't I've never went back to listen to that, but it was a podcast. But, yeah, I'm sure something in that triggered something that that, but I mean, it was a life's worth of, you know, energy building up. And I would always be the sort of person to take the easier way of life. In terms of confrontation, especially in a family dynamic, my sister always took the brunt of it and would say things and that's you know, she would always end up in trouble for her. But that's that's generally what your older, sibling does and they protect your the younger sibling, and it's just a different dynamic. And, you know, I really needed to well, really the art of communication is what I learned to myself to begin with and then get everyone else thereafter, which is key.

Biff [00:18:04]:
That's the best thing I've ever the best thing I've ever done.

Claudia [00:18:08]:
Yeah. So you were saying you weren't working as much?

Biff [00:18:12]:
No. Actually, I was self employed. I had a really great year and then I hit the depression and then I didn't wanna do anything, so I I stopped. But thankfully, I worked hard, made up a bunch of money, and I was able to take the time off to think of of things that I needed to.

Claudia [00:18:28]:
So you'd lost the motivation to work, to snowboard. Did you know at the time that you were depressed?

Biff [00:18:34]:
Oh, Oh, yeah. Big time. Big time.

Claudia [00:18:38]:
And so what were you doing with your time? How did you fill your days?

Biff [00:18:43]:
The biggest thing that annoyed me was, and I think you can all relate to some description, was procrastination. I wake up in the morning, don't have a system, or not really listening to myself and adhering to that system. And then it would be, like, 7 or 8 o'clock a night before I would finally, like, go and do something. And I mean, it would still be up floating around talking to someone or, you know, doing something, but really not leaving the confines of the house. And then it would be, like, you know, late in the evening, and the whole sleep cycle was off. I would stay up late, so that wasn't helping, which is all part and parcel. But then it was like, hey. If you wanna get up super late, but you're, you know, you're still getting the same light of sleep.

Biff [00:19:23]:
It's just like you're changing their day, like, just flow, no constraints, kinda just live outside the constraints of what society kinda generally lives by, and all these things just let trying to let it flow. Smoked so much pot, a lot too much, but also at the same time, it just kinda buried me in the emotions that were coming up to a degree, but then it also brought them up, which was great. At the same time, it was definitely a double edged sword. But, yeah, getting up and then not doing something and then getting in the guilt trip loop of not, you know, just not letting up on myself and I would literally just be just like the infinite id. Feel bad for not getting up and doing something and then when I actually done something, I would feel guilty because I could have done it earlier on and done more. Because once it was out, it was all stoked and ready to rock and roll, but it was, like, getting over the inertia to get going. Over time, which is still on my notes, today at 8 o'clock every every day, the little message and it just says, you know, like, get yourself outside. And even if you have been outside all day, like, just go anyway, you know.

Biff [00:20:33]:
And that system got me moving to achieve that goal. And then now, like, of course, I don't even look at it, but sometimes I see it and then, you know, it makes me smile because then it gives me an idea of where it was.

Claudia [00:20:43]:
Yeah. Yeah. Well, and you love a walk. Right?

Biff [00:20:47]:
The best thing in the world. I was robbing myself of joy by not walking. But, yeah.

Claudia [00:20:54]:
And so what do you think the importance of getting out and getting that walk in every day was in terms of your ability to come out the other side of that?

Biff [00:21:02]:
Yeah. It's like walking, snowboarding, biking, hiking, whatever it is that you wanna do outside just you gotta go. You gotta get outside and do it because you're gonna feel even if it's the worst weather. In fact, it's even better. I love the storm because it's so peaceful in there, and then you come back and you feel like you've done something in your day. You've moved, which is always good. We know that is good for our bodies and, like, even if it's the smallest walk, it's just the art of doing the thing is all that matters.

Claudia [00:21:30]:
Do you think it's about the physical activity or do you think it's about being out in nature?

Biff [00:21:34]:
Just being out. I mean, the physical activity is great. Of course, if we don't get enough, you go work out, but just be a night side. Like that day, we were going across Russet Ridge Russet Ridge, like, I was just playing along, it was so funny. I was playing along, couldn't see a thing, when was Highland, and it was, like, kinda like, ice flurries or kind of whatever it was, just hit us up at Fierce, and I was so sick, like, maybe 50, 60 k wind and just I was just singing, what was that song, riders in the storm. The best, no one around, that's that's the way I like it, it, you know, the bigger the storm the better. Wow. To a degree if you're in a wrong spot.

Claudia [00:22:18]:
Yeah. We've been on a couple trips. We hiked the Sunshine Coast Trail together. I think

Biff [00:22:24]:
Best longest hike ever.

Claudia [00:22:25]:
In the in the midst of your recalibration.

Biff [00:22:29]:
Oh, we got amazing weather the whole trip, kinda maybe re in for a couple of hours the second day or first day whatever it was, But there was a storm the whole 10 days for me, like, the whole the whole time. And, I mean, I was so stoked I went on it, and thanks for letting me go. Especially last last minute, like, I didn't, I didn't I didn't bring anything to the table, like, in terms of that was last minute, it was you and Lewis' vision. And I was like, oh, I, you know, need to do something. I think it was pretty last minute, Lewis.

Claudia [00:22:57]:
I mean, that's not how I remember it. I remember Lewis having the idea and him, but you and Lewis were on board, like, you were at all of the meetings we had. I mean

Biff [00:23:06]:
True. I'm necessarily can't remember every detail in that because it was a point where I was just so far removed and, you know, I just knew that you guys would make it happen, and I'll be, I'll be there to do the thing.

Claudia [00:23:22]:
What do you remember from that trip?

Biff [00:23:25]:
Getting the food wrong.

Hannah [00:23:29]:
So Johnny learned a very important lesson hiking for, what was it, 7 days, 10 days?

Claudia [00:23:33]:
180 kilometers.

Hannah [00:23:34]:
On the Sunshine Coast Trail. And what was that very important lesson that you learned about food?

Biff [00:23:39]:
Didn't bring enough. But to a credit to myself, I weighed everything. I counted all the grams and everything else. I just got the, the base calorie count completely off by probably 2,000 calories.

Hannah [00:23:53]:
A day?

Biff [00:23:54]:
A day.

Hannah [00:23:54]:
Yeah. And Johnny eats a lot for

Biff [00:23:57]:
All the food. For the record. But, yeah, we we we learn Learned some good things, of course. Learned well, more learned all good things, from that trip. But, yeah, didn't even have the I did not have the ability to speak up on anything that was, anything that I wanted really. I found it hard, just because I just didn't have the energy to to do that mentally, which is crazy, but you can, like, physically, you can put yourself through what ever you you desire, and your your your mind will take it. That wasn't the hardest thing. Like, hiking thing, I could have probably done 20 days of how to ride food, but it was just it was just like the the what it was dealing with inside.

Biff [00:24:40]:
Definitely, some of the photos, I was just like, wow. Like, looking back in some of the photos, I am not the air lights are on, but no one's home. Like

Claudia [00:24:49]:
Yeah. I mean, I can remember you you weren't you weren't as absent as I think maybe you think you were, but definitely not the usual amount of contribution to

Biff [00:25:02]:
the conversation. Yeah. Yeah.

Claudia [00:25:05]:
Yeah. Yeah.

Biff [00:25:05]:
That's that's my gauge worth. I'd like to be involved and just having a laugh and, you know, doing the things. But, like, you know, the trip I went on the trip because I wanted well, one I wanted to do. I've only ever done, like, maybe a one night out of a backpack. You've done a bunch of camping, but only one night. So it was good to, good to learn and it was beautiful. It was a beautiful trip.

Claudia [00:25:31]:
It was so impressive to me too the way that you tackled that feat with only one night camping experience under your belt. You were so stoked about doing your food calculations, and you were so interested in

Biff [00:25:46]:
Stay stoked.

Hannah [00:25:47]:
Well, I mean,

Claudia [00:25:47]:
you were so interested in optimizing your systems and, yeah, you were you were super keen. It was clear that you were working through some things on the trail, but I remember being so so impressed. One of the things that you said to me at the end of the trip, and I remember so clearly, I so I asked you if you would ever do anything like that again, and you were like, absolutely not. And then you said you didn't find it that physically challenging, but that you were bored.

Biff [00:26:20]:
Yeah. We bet.

Claudia [00:26:20]:
I would love to hear how you think about it now, given how much time and distance you've had from the experience, but given that you were working through some things, like, how

Biff [00:26:31]:
The the boredom came from the fact that it wasn't letting myself be as present as I could have been. Mhmm. Not allowing myself to go swimming, love swimming, love I'm not allowing myself, go swimming. Why why did I do that? Eating the berries. So hard against, like, even letting, someone teach me things, and just, like, it was just a wall. That's why I was bored. That's I mean, I didn't again, did not have the words to describe that in the moment, or yeah. Probably the understanding, but really that's that's what it was.

Biff [00:27:04]:
It's life, you know. Would I rather be out in that again than sitting in the house for 10 days doing the same thing? Absolutely, you know, like, it's it's a no brainer. So really just kinda not letting letting myself enjoy the present moment. That's what that was down to. Just because I was in, in, in the hole was in a storm which it was a big one. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Biff [00:27:29]:
It was good, but not at the time.

Hannah [00:27:33]:
And what was the turn around? Like, what what got you out of that? What changed it?

Biff [00:27:40]:
It did last quite quite a time, but I think just, you know, every day doing something, I eventually went back to work for someone, and I worked on a 4 day schedule. That's the the thing on the return to the same company that sort of wanted, because I wanna ensure that I had time off so I wasn't overloading my life. So I wasn't dealing with the things that I needed to deal with. I still needed to work on those things, and, you know, what works like. You just overload yourself and then bury it and away you go and you repeat the cycle. But I wanted to make sure that I was I was tending to the things I needed to. And I think that it was must have been a year pretty much two and a half years. One solid year where it was pretty tough, and that was in the middle of it.

Biff [00:28:27]:
And then even having, like, a chance with Lewis on-site and, like, just getting emotional nearly and, like, on a site, especially front load of dudes. You don't wanna do that. I mean, you should. And but, of course, you don't wanna, especially certain people on that site. There wouldn't be really facilitating for such emotional exchange. But, yeah, I just kept working, kept setting up Wii systems, and and ultimately getting myself outside. That's what's doing the things I love to do. Mountain biking, trials riding, snowboarding, and just like doing the things.

Biff [00:29:04]:
Like, I bought a trials bike last summer, did not ride it once. Did not ride it once, took me to the next year and that was because I need the sort out boots or something like that, but just didn't do it. Could not like have the energy to do it. And it seems kinda silly, but I mean, that's just the way it goes and but then slowly but surely started picking up the motion and, away I went. And then of course when I met Hillary, that's that's when it just went, like, huge, you know, that way because you got you got you got someone in your immediate corner who's looking looking after you in there who sees it, and can help and adapt to to help, you know, like a simple thing of, like, oh, I'll get the dishes as well as making the dinner because it's just those wee things, that's why you communicate. And I remember the first the first time we went touring and Hillary's huge in touring, big, lover of outdoors, and I grew up in Whistler and just loves it. And I've never been in a dynamic before in a relationship where my partner has, like, as let's say, the girl had more logistical knowledge and experience than I had in this field, and I felt that small. But I couldn't I couldn't I couldn't, work out how to explain that in the day.

Biff [00:30:19]:
So again, kinda like done what I normally done. Just, like, kinda went inward, but she knew there was something up. So later on that night, we tried to chat. It took me, like, I don't know, an hour and a half. She thought I was gonna break up with her because I was trying to I need to tell you something, but I didn't know. And, like, it was emotional. She was crying. I was like, no.

Biff [00:30:37]:
I'm like because I didn't think it was fair of me to say that I felt that way, because I've, again, never been in this level of well, she was the first person I've actually been in a relationship with that I've wanted to really open up. And I just said I kinda felt inadequate today and in in the backcountry and whatever else. And and and then again, she shaped. She's had that knowledge. And the next time we're out, she shaped that to suit. So then she got me more in in involved, and go about it in a way that I would, you know, be receptacle to you, and if that's a word. Receiptigating off. But yeah.

Claudia [00:31:20]:
Receptive too.

Biff [00:31:21]:
Receptive that's the one I'm thinking that plugs. So yeah, like that was that was a big that was a big up And of course, I was doing a lot of work myself to get there, but then I had a big well, just had a dying moment, and then that was that was so like, so naive to think that you would never go back in the storm. And then as time went on, I realized, okay, like, every time you go in, you you know that you're gonna come out the other side, you know it's gonna be fine. And then you set it easy. And and now now it's like it's it's not easy, but you still feel it and anytime it comes up, I just set intention. I can pretty much this past year in 2023, I had 4 episodes of where I dropped, like, just woke up and I fell down. You felt like you you cried on you, and I set intention, told Hillary, of course, set intention, probably tells many people as possible. Set intention of, like, looking after, you know, good hydration, good nutrition, looking after work is gonna look after the financial tomorrow.

Biff [00:32:22]:
And and then just do the things that, if you have the energy, do the things that you you know that give you a lot of energy. And if you have projects on where you can't you can't, you know, you got projects on that other people relying on. You just have to communicate and, like, say, hey, this is all that I can give in this moment because you gotta look after you or else you're just gonna burn yourself out. And, you know, really, literally, I just say this to myself, and then the next day, I'm back in the same level, literally the exact same energy levels I was the day prior of going into that, like, heaviness feeling, which is just by going in and out all the time then you just learn tools. Practice makes, makes a better job.

Claudia [00:33:05]:
I can obviously attest to the fact that Hillary has been an excellent source of support for you, and you've got these tools now, and you've got your systems dialed in, and you can recognize, you know, when you're dipping and what that looks like, feels like. What other sources of support did you seek out when you were going through your recalibration?

Biff [00:33:31]:
For me, looking back now, it should have been more friends, really. But again, didn't know how to communicate it. So that was the whole journey is how to communicate and, you don't wanna, like, feel like a burden nearly on people, like, yeah, against the culture it come from, you know, like, they don't really talk about those things. But young Pablo was the biggest every single day. Good thing about Instagram, not all good, but some it is a lot of good for me, which was the algorithm just showed me young Pueblo every single day. And that was it. I just read those things, it's like, would I just go and left the book? No. Not necessarily, but just young Pueblo every single day, which probably just to go back.

Biff [00:34:16]:
Ruth Goldberg should give me a book on the four agreements, and that was really the kicker of, like, okay, I need to do something. I was already at a point where it's still fine, but talk to him, maybe 2 months prior to him actually giving me the book, because his friend, Jodie, had it. And then he hit me up one day, say, have got that book. And I've never read a book so quick in my life. It was two and a half days. It's a small book, but it's pretty, pretty good for me. And that was the kicker of of, like, the journey, and then young Pueblo definitely took me through.

Claudia [00:34:47]:
Will you tell our listeners who young Pueblo is?

Biff [00:34:51]:
To be honest, I would like to say no worries from that. I'm the queen. I just know he's, writing self help books and like more like a poetry kind of style book. Super easy to read because you could pick it up anywhere and read it, and it doesn't it can flow wherever. In fact, he's done that very well. We can just pick it up and open it wherever and read it and it makes sense. But when you read it start to finish, it is a story of his life. And about him meeting his partner on years they were just, like, going at it.

Biff [00:35:23]:
You know, they loved each other so much and they were working it out, but they were just going out of all the time and they would trigger each other all the time. And then they both fancily end up going on to a journey and and, realizing what true love is and, like, non attachment and, like, when you can not so much be the better person, it's not really about us. When you can realize that your past trauma is getting in way of your future self and your present self and stopping out. It's not about who's winning. So, like, learning that and kinda finally, he's going through the journey as we all are, I guess, but, like, he was writing this stuff as he was pretty much feeling it and as he as he recorded maybe in his notes in the past, which is kinda cool. So

Claudia [00:36:03]:
Yeah. So writing is part of his coping mechanism?

Biff [00:36:07]:
Yeah. But usually. Yeah. Usually. Yeah. Yeah.

Claudia [00:36:10]:
Cool. Did you do any therapy while you were?

Biff [00:36:13]:
Yeah. Really, actually not that much, which I I mean, comparisons, I don't know. But a bit, definitely should have done it more would have held but expensive and those sorts of things but huge huge. I've heard seen a woman because I don't know. Just that's probably the reasoning why it's easier. I find it easier to talk to women than I do, men about that sort of stuff. And, yeah, it was it was huge. Helped so much.

Biff [00:36:41]:
Cherry cup of tea, nice, sweet chair, like, you're in the chair. It's good. It was good.

Hannah [00:36:46]:
So how is that navigating a new relationship kind of as you're not necessarily in the throes of it, but you're kind of in that process of coming out of the storm. How was that meeting a new person and you're learning how to communicate and ask what you need and trying to set up healthy foundation for a fantastic relationship with someone who's incredible. How how did that go?

Biff [00:37:09]:
I think with our first date, we started biking up to, what you call that? Trail. Anyways, on on Creekside. And we just talked the whole way up the, the hill. And I was asking kinda like forward questions as such, you know, like deep questions that you would never really ask someone on a first date.

Claudia [00:37:31]:
Give us an example.

Biff [00:37:33]:
Just about, because I was going through the, you know, my emotional past, then I was asking pretty much her the same thing, and I could tell it was a few things that she was kinda like, well, I don't know if we should say that right now. She doesn't wanna give too much away, but I was just given in. It's probably the first time that I've just shown everything. You know, there's no reservation or like, oh, you know, that was blazed though. It's kinda funny. So I panic smoke before before going on a bike ride.

Claudia [00:38:03]:
Did you tell her that?

Biff [00:38:04]:
Yeah. Yeah. Like long after, but then she was like, I

Claudia [00:38:08]:
can't believe it.

Biff [00:38:10]:
But realising that she had just been through again, that was right, kinda in the midst of COVID, so at least for for her when she had started and a lot of reflection time and and she was in the same kind of thing, you know, just looking at things she wanted to change and, like, she wanted to do differently. And so she was open. She was open to the concept of of that, and that was huge because we connected on the same, the same level, which made it well, you gotta meet people at the same level and on the same path at a certain time, and it just helps it help facilitate both our journeys, you know. As I got on and got rolling, it took me a while to even then get to the point where I could set my own boundary and say, hey, no. Actually, this like, you know how it works, you know. Just feeling confident enough to say, hey, you know. Opposed to always, like, trying to make someone happy. That's always what I wanna do.

Biff [00:39:02]:
I wanna make someone happy, but also you gotta have boundaries and all the fun stuff you gotta work out.

Claudia [00:39:07]:
Yeah. Welcome to the people pleaser club. Yeah.

Biff [00:39:10]:
Yeah. Yeah. It's very difficult.

Hannah [00:39:14]:
How did you learn to communicate better, ask what you need, open up to your friends, set boundaries?

Biff [00:39:21]:
I think just, well, the Four Agreements, the book, the Four Agreements. I read that with just logistical sense, like everything just me, like why is not the whole world running off this? And there's some people read it and kind of look into it, oh, spiritual blah blah blah. I'm like, no no. It's like regardless if you're in the spirituality or not, you know, it's like he it just makes sense.

Hannah [00:39:43]:
Can you give us a synopsis of of what the 4 agreements

Claudia [00:39:48]:
are? A summary.

Hannah [00:39:51]:
Could you explain to us

Biff [00:39:53]:
what what Oh, he's got a

Hannah [00:39:55]:
Could you explain to us what what is the 4 agreements?

Biff [00:39:58]:
I'll probably not even remember all 4 of them, but, it's just you got impeccability of the word. So huge one, you know, you gotta be impeccable with your you gotta say what you feel and what you're trying to like, of course, that's not easy. Sometimes you don't know what it is, but that's why you just communicate, and it's all about communication, effective communication. Don't take things personally. Again, you take things personally, and then it kinda goes on the basis of, don't make assumptions. Because if you take something personally, then you make assumptions in your head and the story goes around and then all of a sudden, because you haven't communicated effectively effectively enough, then you find yourself a something very simple. Because generally, from, like, a nice place, you don't wanna, like, where I was coming from. Like, I don't wanna impose on Hillary.

Biff [00:40:52]:
I don't wanna ask her to do something for me, to accommodate something for me because, well, like, I think I was worth it that was probably the thing. But then because I was trying to be nice and not like put her under pressure with something that I wanted then I wouldn't communicate it then that's where it would come into you, you know. But I to be honest I've never really had that issue with Hillary because I've just communicated, which is and the first one being the the after the touring day. And after that, I just like, oh, this is actually okay. I would get the thing called me and Edens, me and Chris or Edens would call it the turn where you would get turned off someone, and I've experienced that a lot with with any partner, but I experienced in the game with with Hillary at the start, but it was because I wouldn't communicate anything and then I would shut myself in. It would just get closer and closer and then your your brain would start to go, oh, you know, you'd I'd be better with someone else or I'd be better single and I key it's an exit strategy and which was from the story that Rich Rich Leebright told us about his trip, and like that just sparked something in my brain. I'm like, well, of course, you're just you're telling yourself what's gonna happen next. And that's what that book's all about.

Biff [00:42:05]:
It it really it really, gives you the tools to work around that, and that's literally the four agreements is the best thing. That's that's that's what it is in a nutshell, I think.

Claudia [00:42:16]:
I'm learning so much. The the turn.

Biff [00:42:20]:
Yeah. The turn. That's what we need to call it. And when we're younger, it was kinda like funny. The turn was funny, but, you know, as we and it's still kinda is, you know, we talk about it, but now I've I've broken that up. Now, Eden's because we understood it the same way. He understands what it is that that is happening. Also, of course, he's a different person, but he all his things are different than than mine, but this the same, what's the word? You see him promise? Kinda.

Biff [00:42:48]:
Yeah.

Hannah [00:42:49]:
Yeah. Those things are are funny when you're younger and then as you get older when the same thing keeps happening in each relationship and you're like, I think I think there's a skimmer and I think maybe maybe

Biff [00:43:01]:
it might

Hannah [00:43:02]:
be me. Yeah.

Biff [00:43:02]:
I think there's an arrow pointing. Yeah. And that's and that's it. Like, you gotta you gotta and that's what I did. I went in more than, you know, young Pablo's first book, Inward.

Claudia [00:43:14]:
Yeah.

Biff [00:43:14]:
Actually that alongside the outdoors, as you know and maybe if you've looked through my Instagram, I didn't really write that much and I probably should not daily but I have different systems that work for me. But at the time I wrote a bunch of a bunch of bullshit. Sometimes looking back like, that's not a good one. You were you were close, but you just couldn't find the words. But I would that's when I use my camera the most on my phone or at an SLR. But I just find, like, I took some amazing photos of it is, if I do say so myself, but then I would have a piece of writing that had already probably pre written in in my notes. And then I would put it to that that picture because it would feel, and that was just that was how I was just getting it back out in the world and getting it out there. Kinda easy in a platform that everyone has access to see, but there's no real emotional connection to that thing because it's a it's not a person.

Biff [00:44:16]:
I don't know. Made sense at the time, so it worked.

Hannah [00:44:18]:
You've mentioned systems a few times, and there's a a few things that you've shared about how you got out of where you were. What are your systems on the day to day? You've shared what you do on days when you wake up and you've got that black cloud and you know you need to get do things to get out of that space, but on your normal day to day, are there certain things that you do every day that keep you connected to yourself?

Biff [00:44:41]:
Just gratitude. That was the big thing, gratitude. I can remember who told me that as well when I was going through that, but just, you know, the three things that you're grateful for or whatever. Her many things you're grateful for, do not matter. There's no cap. But, I don't know. I just have it built in. And the second I feel, anyway, different than good, then I do the things that I need to.

Biff [00:45:03]:
And I don't ignore it because if you ignore it, then it'll build. And that's when, you know, that's a form of insanity, really. If you do this, you you do it anyway, you know, and you don't listen to yourself and you know you it's a simple, like, just stop, Look around and sometimes I get when I used to work for, Gavin Construction, just working like crazy. And I've just and, like, always always work work work work work. There's so much work to do. Always crazy timelines. And, like, you're just feeling the building the building. And I was one time, I was doing a formwork first there.

Biff [00:45:39]:
Well, and I was just, like, the pipes everywhere, rebar, like, just tools in your back store, and I just looked up and looked at the trees, and look behind me, look at what's for black. I'm gonna make a life screw. You know? And that's it's just those things. That's simple pull, like, was, what, 20 seconds? And then I'm, like, I'm stuck, you know? Because I'm, like, when I finish here, sure it's a hard week. The weekend, I'm riding my bike. I'm doing the things that I moved here to do, and that's that's really it. Just align time to do the things that you need to do, like, reflection. And I always thought, like, oh, you gotta do this, and I always felt guilty.

Biff [00:46:11]:
I need to do this. I need to do that. But it's just little and often, you know, it's like scratching. We all don't do enough, but little and often, you know, and same with working out. Same with even, you know, snowboarding, like, if you always wanna go out and ride bell to bell, but sometimes just good to just go, you know, and just do the thing. If you can get a few laps in through the week's wait. Just whatever it is, you just gotta you gotta do it. And anytime you do do it, you feel good.

Biff [00:46:40]:
You know, that's pretty much it. Just just, just listen yourself.

Claudia [00:46:46]:
You've undergone such a journey in your time here, and you're now a citizen of Canada. Did you ever question whether or not this was the right place for you to be Given how hard things were, given that you were going through

Biff [00:47:02]:
the storm? I don't think ever. I don't think ever. I didn't think after my first two years visa was up being from Northern Ireland you get dual citizen sit with Irish and British visa. So I was like kind of relying on us, like, oh, I can always come back and like very easily, which was great. So I thought going to New Zealand actually, and I was like, that's I'm stoked up to do that. And then my boss at the time, GCC, put me through my permanent residency, which I'm thankful for and stoked that he sponsored me and give me a good wage. And I come, like, okay. I'm gonna stay.

Biff [00:47:35]:
And and then that was it. Like, there was no going back. Really? No. Never. I don't think I ever thought about going home once. In fact, quite the opposite.

Claudia [00:47:45]:
And what do you do?

Biff [00:47:46]:
This is home? Yeah. This is home.

Claudia [00:47:48]:
Great. Love to hear it.

Biff [00:47:50]:
Which is I'm sure everyone knows that.

Hannah [00:47:51]:
That was a loaded question by Claudia in case anyone couldn't pick that up. Making sure Johnny is not leaving.

Biff [00:48:00]:
No. It's, everyone all my friends back home are all stoked, you know, and my parents are stoked and stuff like that. Of course, that's hard, but you gotta live your life. And where you're born is it might happen to, our kids if we're if we're lucky enough to have kids, you know, it's you don't know. They might they might go up, I wanna travel the world and end up somewhere else where they feel at home and that's that's what it's all about. You gotta you gotta fly.

Claudia [00:48:25]:
Yeah. Everyone's gotta find their way.

Biff [00:48:27]:
Mhmm.

Claudia [00:48:27]:
What are your favorite ways to spend time in the outdoors?

Biff [00:48:30]:
I looked at that last question. Just being outside for 1, and is doing any kind of sport, really, but last summer, one of the sickest weekends was Dela Creek, which was great because it was 22 lads. It was a lads trip, real lads trip. It was a lot of like pre talking and words because we had I got into the trip where we had like, calmer dying because testosterone and, fires and chainsaws and bikes and trucks and all of the things, but camping in a rooftop tent with Tom Miller was pleasant. It was always a good time. We brought our trials bikes, riding those, and then riding our mountain bikes and like we shuttled. We all done a lap and then people will shuttle, but at the at lunchtime, we all came back. We dropped extra trucks down at the bottom, came back up, made lunch, and then we're all 22 of us done one lap as a train dine, which was just phenomenal.

Biff [00:49:29]:
It was the best the best thing. Regardless of just lads or whatever, like, as long as if it was mixed regardless. We're just shredding bikes, camping, and listening to music, hanging out, and I'll be partaking in some psychedelics, and all the fun stuff. And then on the way back, most people have went home and then a few of us stayed, and we just done drone shots going through Duffy Lake on the Bali section, and then we stopped the Duffy Lake, lake itself, and got that really cute photo of me and Tom sounding butt naked. There was a full car of chicks strobe by, and they were at the window, like, scraping on me all in the helicopter. Oh my god. We were just like, yeah. Because we all we all just jumped in and had done a skinny dip and, we just oh, it's hilarious.

Claudia [00:50:18]:
The helicopters were really impressive.

Biff [00:50:20]:
Oh, yes. We no. But what was what was funny was that we all turned and done the exact same thing without thinking.

Claudia [00:50:28]:
I love it.

Biff [00:50:29]:
That was fun. And, of course, to say, not just lads, that was a great weekend. Yes. But anyone, you know.

Claudia [00:50:36]:
Okay. But what is special about lads trips? Because I love a girl gang. I've been spending a lot of time kind of prioritizing time with my

Biff [00:50:47]:
We're different people.

Claudia [00:50:48]:
Yeah. So so but tell us tell us about, like, the magic of a of a lab's trip.

Biff [00:50:53]:
I mean, effectively, we do the exact same thing, except we're doing something else at the same time as doing that exact same thing. Like, if someone's out with a chainsaw, like, you know, trying to carve something or whatever, someone's trying to light a fire, It's trying to not do massive fire. There's a problem with that. You know, just like, I don't know. We're doing something with the truck. There was this, like, massive surge, and I was like, I'm gonna drive up that, you know, and like just effectively doing the same thing. It's just lads hanging out with lads and there's certain point of conversation you don't have to explain, segue in or, like, whatever. You just there's somewhat of a no filter, you know.

Biff [00:51:33]:
Of course, everyone there was amazing lives, you know, all like minded, nice people, and that's obviously number 1. But but, yeah, just just talking and you don't have to explain yourself at certain times, you know, some is a wee bit crude. It's alright. And obviously that might be about women. You know? But, yeah, you know you know, like, yeah, when there's when there's when there's, when there's men around that you're there's certain things that you won't stand a certain way because they're there and whatever you know. It's just pretty much anything.

Claudia [00:52:06]:
Yeah.

Biff [00:52:07]:
I mean, I don't know. We just well, us lots ride bikes, talk absolute shit, and, you know, fix something or talk about, oh, yeah. I'm gonna get this rack on the truck and it's gonna do this and you know?

Hannah [00:52:22]:
So we did an episode a while ago about, like, you know, introducing your partner to the outdoors. And Claudia and I are both in the situation that Hillary was your partner of being, like, more experienced than our partners in some areas. And I kind of have it both ways a little bit, I guess. How has the outdoors like been a part of your relationship? How has it solidified your relationship and how has it challenged your relationship with those dynamics?

Biff [00:52:55]:
I think, I mean I've hit the jackpot for 1, which is great

Hannah [00:53:01]:
true.

Biff [00:53:01]:
Which is for a whole host of reasons, but I don't know. We both bring things to the table, and we have experience. I can feel a lot of, like, trials bike and bikes experience and camping and whatever else. And okay. Maybe not to the same extent where I'm just above the northwest faces. My passing nearby to drop in and, like, sunrise. Like, that's sick. I've never done it those things.

Biff [00:53:24]:
Hillary's brought me into that winter camping. Definitely type 2 fun. I do enjoy it, but I even though I'm on a snowboard, it's not snowboarding in my eyes. It's it's walking in the woods. So now I have kinda compartmentalize that and go, okay. I wanna do the cabin trips. So then it makes me go and do them and, because it is fun. It's just not snowboarding.

Biff [00:53:43]:
It's to go for a walk. And that's what I had to do. So I kinda get myself set for that, but she's teach me all that and, you know, she's stoked to get the tent. She bought a new, winter tent, and she was stoked to use it. And, you know, I'm I'm happy to go along because she's showing me as as I will show her other things, like trials riding or, you know, like, rooftop tent. She was like, we've already got a tent. We don't need 1. First night, I was like, this is the best thing ever.

Biff [00:54:09]:
She bought the rack for it, you know, so then we can have her bikes in the back, and we go up, like, went to Bralorne for a weekend. The summer went to actually one of the best rec sites I've ever been to, which was Kingdom Lake. So beautiful park right by the water, huge mines, great view, and we just ride bikes in Bralorne that day, and you just count in the bush, and it's it's great. I don't know. To be honest, in the outdoors and the whole relationship, there's never really any hard conflict. We just talk it out.

Claudia [00:54:40]:
That dynamic of one partner teaches the other something and then that partner teaches the other partner back. There's an exchange there that I think is so essential to a healthy relationship.

Biff [00:54:50]:
And even plan filled as such. Yeah. I think. Whereas, I know so many friends who, like, love the outdoors and want to go more and want to do more, but their partners don't. And they are, you know, they're definitely doing other things with their partner and what they love to do. But it's so hard because then you end up messing out on so much fun with your friends and as well as your partner, you know, that you could get that. Like for instance, Hillary's mountain biking, of course, she's a fairly achievable, human being, which helps. But she's only got into mind biking in, you know, with the last 5 years.

Biff [00:55:23]:
But, you know, I was like, okay. Well, I gotta slow down. Like, I gotta slow down, but then I did invest a lot of time into her growth. And of course, she's she's gonna get in courses and, like, get doing doing trail nights and whatever else. But now we can shred double black diamonds, and we can shred together and, like, we're doing the stuff that keeps me, like and she actually likes to do the same, you know. She prefers the Enduro trail post to the flow trail. And, like, you know, that took maybe 3 years of, like, okay. Let's go out.

Biff [00:55:53]:
We just go and walk trails backwards because that's that's what you do in trials. You'll walk, get the section, and you'll look at it, and you'll walk the line of what you're gonna gonna do. You don't do that mountain biking because it's flowing. Trials, you come to a section, look at it, and then ride it. So I just took that approach, and then we actually kinda went out and psychedelic trips and walked through the forest. Not all the time, of course, but walked through the forest, and then we talked talked certain lines. There was a trail of green monster she wanted to do, and we just walked the whole thing. And then the next summer, she wanted to get on it and poor sleep broke her ankle, but then the the summer after, they got straight into it.

Biff [00:56:30]:
And, like, she wrote the first four features, tapped out on adrenaline, couldn't write anything else, even something that was easier just because she was so, like like, overloaded. And then went back, got herself on a camp which was an 8 week, Enduro camp which was great and then started riding and this is like, oh, this, you know, you get she got the confidence and I were shredding double blacks together which is just sick but there's a dynamic shift there because before she would watch me and kinda get worried and now I'm watching her absolutely breaking it. Like, I am breaking it watching her. I kinda can't And then I get to this the rock roll, I'm kinda like, okay, if she goes, I'll just body check her out of the way of the tree. Like, I'm literally thinking that's who she does and smash a tree.

Claudia [00:57:16]:
I love that investment in each other. You know, the fact that you had that conscious notion that you had to slow down so that you could invest,

Hannah [00:57:23]:
you know, your time and time.

Biff [00:57:24]:
Told me to as well. But, yes, I am.

Claudia [00:57:27]:
And that's, you know, that's Hillary being able to communicate what she needs from you and and you 2 coming to an understanding Yeah. About that and and then being able to see that

Hannah [00:57:37]:
investment in each other pay

Claudia [00:57:38]:
off down the road. That's Yeah. It's everything.

Biff [00:57:43]:
So it's super grateful for that.

Claudia [00:57:45]:
Yeah. It's

Biff [00:57:45]:
everything. So it was super grateful for that. Next up, Charles Beck.

Claudia [00:57:51]:
If you had any advice for, you know, men who are in your situation who either, like, are going through their own recalibration of the subconscious or are in partnerships where they are finding it challenging to overcome some of these kind of gender norms or cultural norms where it's hard to say what you need from your partner or, you know, tell your partner hard truths that are getting in the way of a successful relation relationship. What advice would you give them?

Biff [00:58:24]:
Well, the quote would have said to Rusty, a friend who's just recently found his love like no other. You can tell when someone meets meets their person. But as soon as I seen him after, like, they linked up the first time, I just said, tell that woman everything, and absolutely everything you can ever think of. Anything that comes up, anything that is there that you know you should say, just tell them absolutely everything. As the partner should do the same, just tell them, like, all of your secrets, all of the things that you might be thinking you're ashamed of or of course, there's certain time frame to do that and, like, you gotta open yourself up and whatever else, but just tell them all of the things. Just communicate everything. It's a merge of people. That's what we're trying to do is, people who wanna connect.

Biff [00:59:09]:
You just learn the person so much. You learn them in and out, and you know them in and out because you tell them everything. And you learn and you live experience nearly simultaneously as one. And that's I think that's that's what we're trying to achieve.

Claudia [00:59:24]:
That's a really beautiful idea. Thanks so much for sharing all your insights and sharing your story with us. That's

Biff [00:59:31]:
Well, my pleasure. Thanks for thanks for being the first meal.

Hannah [00:59:35]:
Yeah. Whoo.

Claudia [00:59:37]:
And on that note, thank you so much for listening. We hope it was time well spent.

Hannah [00:59:41]:
We would love to hear your thoughts on today's episode. Message us on Instagram at weatherproofpodcast.

Claudia [00:59:48]:
And if you loved today's episode, please share it with a friend and follow the show wherever you listen to your podcasts.

Biff [00:59:54]:
Happy adventuring.

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